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Foster and Blade TV

Thursday, March 20, 2008

Rate-A-Ho

We got hung up on Eliot Spitzers girl Ashley Dupre:

We played Rate-A-Ho and decided to rate the "classic" look as opposed to her "Girls Gone Wild Look" or her "Clubbing" look.

"Girls Gone Wild" look:


"Clubbing" look:

The "Classic" look:

"Minimal Make-Up" look:

The Verdict:

Foster 6.4

Blade 7.2

"slightly above average as far as ho's go"

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Butt Implants

For starters: The uh....ummmm....the butt implants story was a little weird.


That just had to be discussed so we discussed it. Sorry.

: )


2) This guy told us how he and his group sneaked an entire keg into Cameron Indoor Stadium in 1979 for a Jimmy Buffet show. You gotta be kidding.



3) We have reserved The Old Bar for Thursday night for a big party. The excuse: Blade's Welcome back Party. Everyone is invited. If you recall...the Old Bar was the King Of All Bars in it's day in the 90's, it has reopened this year.


The Old Bar Bartenders in the day:

Bubba Watts
Chris Post
Kevin Frazier
Todd Criscoe

Those guys could keep a drink in your hand at all times no matter how packed that place was and it was mobbed always. See everyone Thursday night!

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

St. Patrick

You missed it. St. Patricks at Nappertandy's.



Friday, March 14, 2008

Ashley Dupre

For Starters:

We had a guy on the show who was a lifelong friend of Eliot Spitzers and was so upset for the governor...he cried during the interview. The guy is a reporter for TV...CNBC. What the hell man.


If your lifelong friend is a national figure and he gets busted for soliciting for prostitution...is it sad?


No. It's funny.


Here she is: Ashley Dupre of "The Emporers Club"



You get treated differently if you look this way.

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Keystone Kops

For starters:

Looking for some new traffic report music...we'll do anything to liven that baby up. We used some different music twists today.

option1
option2
option3
option4
option5

Feel free to call us at any time during the show and voice your opinion...we are, after all, the station of the people. 919-860-9600.
: )

2) Lisa Marie Presley is pissed off. She is suing people for posting photos of her appearing to be fat, when in fact, she is pregnant. We apologize and have taken down these pictures we had posted earlier. We should have checked our sources first.













3) The Dice Man is back...he was on Conan O'Brien last night...it's vintage Dice...we played it back today because you just have to.


Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Two Dollar Pistols

Starting Off:


1) We changed our traffic music because we wanted something different. We know nobody cares...but *WE* do and it's our show so we changed it. To this:




It's just stupid enough but it makes sense because that's how people drive around here. Was traffic guy impressed? We don't thinks so...because he didn't applaud our efforts one bit.


2) Check this out...David Lee Roth without the music singing "Runnin With The Devil". We aired this a few times because it is just too good.




3) Look-we're trying to get a good photo of the receptionist crew...so get off our backs. The "Two Dollar Pistol Crew" we call them because that's what they are as hot as. They are girls so they are picky of what photos go out, so as soon as we take one that they like...we'll post it. Sorry we haven't responded to everyone wanting to see the photos...**YOU** know what women are like. It's not like we can snap one whenever we want because it makes us feel like pervs. We have to ask.


4) Foster was invited To Gary Coleman's Wedding this past weekend in the Poconos-he's a special guy.



Friday, March 7, 2008

Pee Wee Herman

We did this Red Sox story as tastefully as we could:


It was a story that could not be ignored...sorry for the visual. It's not our fault people act like that.


2) Stalker past: Blade recounts the poems he has written to Rebecca Romijn his his "unstable" years... Foster recounts one of the countless sets of lyrics he landed in Weird Al Yankovich's mailbin.



3) The Ultimate SHE-Creation last night at Volume 11..."Sheruption" the Van Halen Tribute Band. Check out their opening track..."Somebody Get Me A Doctor". They blew everyone away.


Thursday, March 6, 2008

David Hernandez

Starting Three:

1) We had to mention American Idol because their contrived scandal is about a finalist who was a stripper for dudes at one time...


2) 4:20 Smokebreak: "Peace Pipe" from Cry Of Love. Kelly Holland is a drummer for "Crush" now...a Raleigh party band. Jason Patterson is a drummer for "Tuesday's Gone" a Skynyrd tribute band...Audley Freed has played with Govt Mule and The Black Crowes and yes, Jimmy Page. Remember the Jimmy Page/Black Crowes tour that played Walnut Creek in 2000? He is now touring with Peter Frampton.

3) Streakers. The British do this and we can never understand how the players on the field don't crack up when a streaker runs through the playing field.

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

The Receptionist

Issue:
Click in and find out the major part of Foster and The Blade for Tuesday March 4th:

unbelievable stuff

That happened 5 times in the middle of "topical humerous interludes"...tornado warnings were all afternoon so we were forced to abandon superior comedy material to warn people of dangerous and perhaps deadly tornadoes in our area.

The New Black Crowes, "Warpaint" came out today...we gave away a bunch of these CD's this past weekend for "Win them before you can burn them" and we played two newbies back-to-back for the 4:20 Smokebreak...Blade's pick "Evergreen" and Fosters pick "Wounded Bird".

(the 96rock receptionists are winners. yessir.)

Michael Winslow will be visiting Foster and The Blade in a few weeks when he hits Goodnights Comedy Club...he is a total pisser...nothing but hilarious sound effects and imitations. Listen here to his intro of our 4:20 Smokebreak doing Jimi:




Blade and Foster: Bald

Monday, March 3, 2008

St. Baldrick

For Starters: St. Baldricks Day Video



The Photos from Saturday St. Baldricks Day:


Fat Tim, Blade and Foster

Blade and Foster at Hibernian Saturday evening.



video: Tripp Tracy of the 'Canes and Blade lop it off on Friday

Friday, February 29, 2008

Round One

Off it comes. Blade crops it off for St. Baldricks at Hibernian Friday afternoon with Tripp Tracy of the Hurricanes doing play by play live on 96rock .

Round two with the rest of the boys Saturday starting at 1pm

Mohawk live on 96rock with Hurricanes announcer Tripp Tracy

Hurricanes TV Announcer with Blade Friday afternoon

All this talk of head shaving...96rock is shaving it's head this weekend for kids cancer for St. Baldricks day...the public is invited to attend Friday at Hibernian at 2pm as The Carolina Hurricanes and Blade lop it off and also Saturday at Hibernian starting at noon where the rest od 96rock shaves it off. The bald look does look okay on some people...but does it look good on the girls?

listener audio: speak out for bald

The Mohawk 1992

(Ummm...what is that lump behind Blade's ear?)

Foster: "The last time I shaved my head, it scared my daughter to death."

Stay tuned for the St. Baldricks day photos ladies and gentlemen...as always...

We'll be here all week.

: )

Thursday, February 28, 2008

Gary Busey

Starting Four

(Kat Von D with Foster and The Blade)

Yesterday's Docket:

1) Gruff. The word is gruff. That's how you would describe Gary Busey treating the 11 year old paporazzi.


Foster: "If it were my daughter I'd pop him in the beak."
Blade: "ahahahahahaha"



2) Losing your hair. Some have the head for it some don't. The big day is Saturday at Hibernian in Raleigh-St. Baldricks Day...96rock gets shaved for kids for cancer...everything starts at 12 noon...let's all represent, huh? We do it yearly. Blade gets his head shaved with Niclas Wallin and Tripp Tracy of the Carolina Hurricanes a day early...on Friday at The Hibernian at 2pm. Catch all the action live on 96rock.


discuss: the ugly heads


3) 5 O' Clock Funnies: It's Letterman again...he's not only going after McCain...he's also busting Ralph Nader's chops.

Twin beating



Photo Of The Day

4) Since we can't show Diablo Cody "in action" (stripping) on this fine Curtis Media web log (of course we have the photos-duh) we'll just have to say it.

"Perky"

We'll be here all week.

: )


Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Valerie Bertinelli

The Starting Three

1) Valerie Bertinelli is now not only telling people she and Eddie Van Halen cheated on each other...but she is telling people WHO she cheated with. We don't care really, but it's barely worth a look because it was a slow day.

It did raise the question though, would you want an ex singing from the mountain top about your fling.

audio: Foster: "Yes if it was Valerie Bertinelli"

Blade: "No-shut up it's nobody's business"



2) Weird Observation Of The Day: Blade saw the video of Lindsey Lohan slipping on her arse coming out of a nightclub in LA over the weekend...but it wasn't about that worthless actress with the fabulous bosoms making a fool of herself...it was about jealousy. Jealousy of the fact it was pouring rain there.

audio: look at all that beautiful, beautiful rain


3) We played a clip of the new Journey lead singer Arnel Pineda...who they found through youtube-pretty durned good.

Monday, February 25, 2008

Christopher Titus

Bring Us The Jokes!

Friday, February 22, 2008

Gene Simmons

It had to be addressed

The Gene Simmons Sex Tape

(oh, we have actual pics that depict the entire misapropriation, but we are sparing you)


Emails and Phoners to the show:

"You've shown us everything you've got. And, baby baby it's not a lot"

“I guess she was afraid he was going to slip her the tongue.”

"it was funny and awful all at once and in the end, it never should have happened."


Foster and The Blade's view on the Gene Simmons Sex Tape

Thursday, February 21, 2008

Old Man

The Starting Three


1) The 5 O'Clock Funnies: Letterman is all over John McCain because he is old. The cat is 72 years old-do we want a 72 year old President?
This is what John McCain looks like.

2) Hillary Clinton tried to start her own chant. You can't start your own chant.
Don't even try

3) A Carolina student after red paint was "spilled" on the UNC Old Well: "NC State is not our rival. Duke is our rival." That is correct for basketball...however...

"None of you even deserve the term "rivals" when we talk about football."-Blade

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Top Of The Hill

Today's Starting Three



1) The Top Of The Hill in Bunn is no longer Top Of The Hill. Franklin County's historical gathering place for the men and the topless girls of the county has been saved. It is now a church. What happened to the mechanical bull we ask? Did they take it?


2) The Great Denials of all time since Roger Clemens keeps trying to deny his use of steroids.


3) Botulism Cards in the grocery store may be a bad sign.

Monday, February 18, 2008

Lindsey Lohan

Today's Starting Five:



1) Lindsey Lohan's nude shots of her being Marilyn Monroe-www.perezhilton.com. We made an uncensored photo of her and saved it as wallpaper for Adam 12-something nice to start his 6-10pm shift off with. And yes, very nice.

2) The new R.E.M. "Supernatural Superserious". We played that and also "So. Central Rain" and "Crush With Eyeliner". Because REM has been so forgotten...they have a date at Walnut Creek set for June 10th.

3) NBA's Slam Dunk wasn't too bad. "Birthday Cake" where Gerald Green leaps and blows out the candle of the cupcake sitting on the backboard and slams 'er down.

4) This weeks Vid: Was this marriage proposal slam dunk at center stage planned? OF COURSE it was. See for yourself.

5) Aries Spears doing his famous Shaq impression-haha!

Friday, February 15, 2008

Screech

On Foster and The Blade Thursday

Foster Presents:

The Things You DON'T Want To Hear From Your Valentine.


It's kind of a seafood themed night. You bought me lobster for dinner...and later, I'll give you crabs.

Don't think of them as socks-think of them as lingerie for your cankles.

Yes yes yes! That was me in the video with Screech.

Thank you thank you-we'll be here all week.

Two weeks down

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Jack Nicholson

On Foster and The Blade Wednesday:

The pictures of 65 year Jack Nicholson came out earlier last year... The man will have his fun. Yeah he's got the man boobs and he's old and all but...



We discussed the line that Jack has said is his icebreaker in a social situation...he walks up to a hottie and and he knows she's saying "here comes the hit" and he says..."did you get pregnant?", weather he knows her or not and there you go. "It keeps a woman off balance".

So yeah...you have to giggle at "man boobs"...the word of the day.


Rock on Jack.


Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Joey Buttafuoco

On Foster and The Blade Tuesday:

Can you believe what we have to go through now? I had to sit there and watch (while we were on the air) Amy Fischer talk about sleeping with Joey Buttafuoco now that he's 50 because they spent a week together trying to reconcile. She actually said that it was "ewwwwwwww". OMG STOP!!!


Do we need that visual???? NO!!!! She said it was okay when he was 33 but he hasn't taken care of himself and he's gross and fat. She, however, isn't too bad-she did augment, of course. You can find her sex tape out there if you look-but only do it if you have nothing better to do.

The Quote Of The Day: "I don't care that Mary Joe has a bullet rattling around in her head, she's a multimillionaire because of all this."
-Amy Fischer

Amy Fischer and Joey Buttafuoco-the veritable scum of the earth.

Saturday, February 9, 2008

Friday, February 8, 2008

The Grammys Day Two

Lou Gossett Jr.

Bridgette Nielsen

Tia Carerre


Paul Rodgers


Nikki Sixx-Motley Crue and SixxAM


Stage for opening ceremony outside the Staples Center with Foo Fighters


Janet Jackson with someone-it's not Michael we don't think.


Kim Kardashian-Daughter of Robert Kardashian and dating Reggie Bush

Updated Video:

Appearances by:

Eliot Yamin-American Idol
Tera Patrick-Thee Adult Film Star
Ministry
Hanson!
American Gladiators
P.O.D.
Patrick Warburton-Seinfeld
Kat Von D-Tattooist for the stars
Evanessence

Thursday, February 7, 2008

The Grammys Day One

Backstage: Showtime 12 noon PST
Ministry-"Al"


American Gladiators-Wolf and Justice


Eliot Yamin-American Idol

Foster and The Blade 30 minutes before showtime


Kat Von D-Famed and Acclaimed tatoo artist


Tera Patrick-Adult Film Star


Patrick Wharburton of "Rules of Engagement" and "Putty" in Seinfeld

Tuesday, February 5, 2008

Opening Night


Foster and The Blade Opening Night at The Hibernian

Foster and The Blade Opening Night at The Hibernian on Glenwood Avenue last night...Jimmy Vinerini and his handstand and you can't see the fact that he's holding a drink in one hand while he's doing the handstand.

The happiest guy in the world is Mike Hartel, a Giants fan, he is our GM who has his back to us behind Foster...he stayed around for a moment and then hurried home to rewatch the Super Bowl ahahaha. We decided it ws best for Foster to run the board for the first couple of days and that was our proudest achievement for opening day-no technical glitches. It was unbelievable for me to be able to play Everlast and Janes Addiction but still play Children Of The Sun. Our first song was by The Who. Long Live Rock.

We ran the poor traffic guy ragged...we were laughing and dicking around and running late and totally screwing him up but he made every single report on time-a fine job. He better not have high blood pressure. I shouldn't have called him "traffic boy"...that was mean and I feel bad.